I always wanted A daughter

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Lil P,  I always wanted a daughter..

artsycraftsymom with Lil p


I don’t think I ever wrote a whole post about my pregnancy or Lil P’s birth story.. Here goes.

My darling darling Lil p, I guess you were as excited as we were to come into this world. I & your papa were married for just 3 months when you made your presence felt. To say we were shocked would be an understatement. I guess we felt unprepared, scared and elated all at the same time. I was 25. We met our gyneac – Dr. Manjula Shivashankar, for an appointment asking her what should we do? I can still remember her words.. “You are young, married and are healthy.. Lots of couples struggle to be blessed with a child and you have been lucky. I don’t think you should have any second doubts” .. That , i truly believe, was the best advice we ever listened to!! and So both me and your papa began our journey to welcome you into this world. I was working full time and wanted to continue for as long as I could. the due date was fixed to Oct 4th, 2006. We told our friends & family.. We did shock quite a few people. We always wanted a girl.. I kept secretly praying that you’d be a girl.. I would imagine you in pink booties, pink frocks. I even had thought of a name for you!! We should have realized what a sweet baby you were .. My pregnancy was a breeze. I felt great. Did not vomit even once. My vitals were stable. I could walk, sleep .. do everything without any discomfort or problems. I ate everything.. did not really have too many cravings. Though I vaguely remember eating a lot of sweets.
I still remember the day when we went for our 3rd month scan.. Hearing your heartbeats was almost magical. I had tears streaming down my eyes and I remember your dad looked quite choked up too. We slept that night curled up and our palms on the tummy that had you inside..

I hate suspense .. be it in a movie , or a story book or in my life! .. I had a hard time not knowing if you were a girl or a boy. No doctor would tell me. By 5 months I could clearly feel your tiny kicks & movements. The kicks would get really hard and painful whenever my manager spoke to me. I still don’t know If you liked him that much or hated him ! Office meetings were a torture and I would end up giggling each time my manager spoke and had to be excused out of meetings.

You are our special baby doll.. Its like our fortunes changed the day you became a part of us! We bought our first car, we booked our first apartment, and have been very thankful for all the joys & luck you have bought. By the 8th month, everyone started saying that you were probably a small baby because of my small baby bump.. and that scared me a little. Some routine test around the 36th week showed that you were in distress .. and we decided to go for an emergency C-section as we did not want to take any chances. We chose Sept 14th. I went to office till the end of the week before you were born. Told goodbyes to all my colleagues, filled up insurance papers. But I was scared if you were ok. By Saturday morning I was too freaked out. I complained that I couldn’t feel your movements.. and we rushed to the hospital. They hooked me up to fetal monitors and only after I heard your heart beats, I was relieved.

We preponed the surgery to 11th Sept. After a planned surgery in the morning, you came into this world. I was wide awake when the doc placed you in my arms and said Its a Girl!!!

ahh! Though you were a border preemie. 37 weeks. You were gorgeous. You were 2.8 kgs at birth and all red-red..You had an amazing voice too. Unfortunately I don’t have a single photo of you from the hospital. You mostly slept through the first day while screaming for milk whenever you were awake. We did struggle quite a bit the first few days in the hospital.. You couldn’t latch on and then the lactogen didn’t suit you and your stomach had to be pumped. The 2nd day you developed jaundice and were placed in a phototherapy machine for 2 days. It was a torture for both you and me! They had taped ur eyes with a gauze and you would try to peep through and follow my voice.. You screamed till you would get tired and then doze off.. Your weight had dropped to 2.4 kgs and were not gaining weight. But you were a fighter and finally after 7 days in the hospital you were discharged. It felt amazing to have you back at home with us.

artsycraftsymom - Lil p golden shower

We had a small naming ceremony at home which you slept through.. When you were 2 months old, we had a special function – The golden shower. This is a special function celebrating great-grand mothers – a way to congratulate the GG-child & GG-mother. We showered both of you with tiny flowers made of Gold & silver

My lil P ,My pinku rani, My shonali, my gunduli!!
I tell you this every morning and I can never tire of telling you this ever! ..
I always wanted a daughter and Now I have you 🙂 – My favoritest girl in the whole wide world.



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  1. What a story Shruti .Nice to know that you also wanted a daughter. When it was time to be a mom for me, I could never ever imagine being a mom to a boy, it was always a sweet little girl and the powers above heard me twice 🙂

  2. So lovely Shruti, I totally teared up at the last paragraph.. could just imagine you waking her up every morning – I have a similar name calling ritual :).

  3. ohh…so sweet… you reminded me of my pregnancy and then my baby boy….For me between a boy or girl, there was no choice but my husband wanted a girl. Sometimes I miss a little girl in my life but try to make it up with my nieces (though get to spend very less time with them)……:-)

  4. whenever I hear a mommy story, it all sounds similar.. the hospital is always a nightmare in all the cases.. some complications or the other.. before and after is never a breeze.. only joy is the smile and playfulness…

  5. This is so beautifully captured and penned down. I almost remembered my times and got choked…. this is called real writing when you get your readers touched from deep within. Keep it up!!!!!

    1. Ohh Dear! I had not read this post of mine in sooo long.
      Made me teary eyed to. Thanks for stopping by and leaving a comment. Hugs.